HEH it's been so long blogger.

ok i just wanted to vent my feelings.

so that other people feel fustrated too! :D ok jk only.

recently i've thinking. and thinking. and rethinking. i seem to have lost myself again. and it's really really terrifying. if you're in this thick, wet, dark and thorny forest of life, with just enough light to view your compass, and that very thing which gives you direction, gives you hope, suddenly malfunctions for no explicit reason whatsoever, stranding you in the middle of nowhere, while everyone else moves past you, unable to see, unable to help. or if you're just a specimen of billions of fish, diving deeper and deeper into life, you suddenly stop, all your momentum, your drive, they all stop. just because you start wondering where the path you take will lead you, and when you stop wondering and begin diving again you realise it's too dark to see any path whatsoever and you're lost. and that you're just another fish. and because you lack direction. you find it hard to fight against the very current that's sweeping you away, because there is no one else to help you. i don't want to care where my road leads, i don't want to care if this path is right, i just want to plunge myself into it and enjoy the ride because i know this is what i want. but at the end of the day. but is this really a secure future. is this really what i can rely on. is this really. i have so many questions. but yet. where are my answers. is this just some bad joke. i hope i can find an answer soon.

oh well. cheer up gerald. there's a mountain of work waiting to greet you with a cheery grin and hearty 'good morning!' tomorrow.

and i've done it such that i get to post it and you don't have to read it unless you have nothing better to do :D

oh i just realised 51-14=37. ok that's just pure nonsense. no not as in that logic behind the equation, rather the context of where the equation is situated.

ok then. i'll be back with physics. byebye.

by any slight slight slight chance you're reading this. can you please give me an indication. how's it going to be. for better of for worse, either will be an answer. and it's the most important answer i need right now.